I don't know what I am. I've had a crush on a few guys in my life but I get uncomfortable at the thought of having a sexual relationship with a man over a woman. I thought I was straight, but I'm really not sure if I'm lesbian or bi.
Recenty, I'd been developing feelings for a friend of mine. She'd always been so nice to me and I looked up to her. One day I thought 'is it something more?' and started freaking out. She is in nearly all of my classes and sits next to me so its hard not to avoid her. In the middle of the day I got terribly lightheaded and dizzy after thinking about her for too long and started crying. My friends demanded to know what it was about but I never told them. This is a usual struggle of a teenage girl growing up, but I wonder if any of you could relate and/or help?
I can very much relate. Teenage years were a struggle for me, too. I was uncertain about my sexuality and relationships and it was really hard for me.
I had a similar experience. I crushed badly on one of my best friends, and was sure she was straight. It made me miserable: I liked her so much but didn't have the courage to tell her. I was scared I'd ruin our friendship. I knew she was a tolerant person (we had a common friend who was bisexual) and I knew she wouldn't hate me or anything, but still, I was scared that things would get very awkward between us.
But somehow, I found the courage to tell her (I just kissed her ^^' well, I was fourteen... Now I wouldn't be so straightforward) AND SHE LIKED ME BACK. We dated for two years and I was the happiest I've ever been. I lived her insanely much.
But then we broke up a few years ago after slowly drifting apart first. And it was the most painful thing ever. It took a long time to recover from that, as I had lost not only a girlfriend but also my best friend (we haven't really spoken since). But these days, I treasure the memories I have from out time together and am happy I was brave enough to pursue a relationship with her. She was my first love and it was a wonderful relationship as long as it lasted. We just... Well, we grew apart. It didn't work out anymore.
After that, I've had only one real crush, which was on my current best friend. I told her and she was flattered, but told me she was straight. She accepted me fully and told me she was sorry, but she only loved me as a friend. It was a disappointment, but it didn't have a negative effect on our friendship. We're still besties :)
I don't know if I'm able to help you to decide what to do, as every person and every situation is different, but I if you truly like your friend, I think you should let them know. If she is a true friend, she'll accept you as you are and won't think any less of you. If she doesn't, then she isn't a real friend. I'd say listen to your heart and go for it, for if she is a good friend, then you have nothing to lose. But I also advice that you should think about your crush on her carefully before deciding what to do. Can you picture yourself in a relationship with her? Do you truly want to be in a romantical relationship with her? Do you think it could work out? Are you sure it's romantical and not just admiration towards a friend? I'm not saying your feelings aren't real, they are probably geniune, but not all attractions are romantical, and it can be difficult to determine whether they are or not. If the answer is yes, then talk to her about it. Like I said, real friends won't abandon their friend for liking them.
Good luck, and remember you can always talk to me about anything! I hope everything goes well! I'm here for you *hug*
Your comment was great too, and I'm sure it was helpful !
.
Did you met her ?
I didn't meet any family of his. We only dated a short while. He just wasn't my type. But I've known him for a long time, we went to the same elementary school, were classmates in junior high and went to the same high school too.
I'd be in heaven! If only she lived in Finland...
