New FictionJunction Album 'Elemental' lyrics

  • Thread starter Thread starter nimsaj
  • Start date Start date
Thanks yuki.n for looking over my trans ^_^ i always LOVE corrections/feedback :sohappy:
...
thank you for all your corrections/observations yuki.n :bow::chuu:

nimsaj, are you able to apply the corrections to your earlier post and highlight them to me (underline / strikeout would be excellent)? Then the kanji / romaji / English translation can be updated.
 
@nimsaj :

we could always use your version of this verse since i'm not sure i understand it 100% :XD:
I'm not sure either!!! :XD: I analyze the grammar and syntax and that's what I come up with, but when I double-check it, it's not making sense :XD: Okay, I guess I'll have to ask my sensei :spotlight: this and the burning clocks from kimi no gin no niwa!!!!!!
OOPS i don't know why i typed up namida since its nami :XD:i'll go edit that right now haha.
it still says waves!!! :XD:

-かくす is also used for people. like "go hide" or something like that. i thought about this:
"please hide those many doors that are yet everlastingly kept shut
within that unreachable darkness"
Kakusu is transitional, so yes it's used for people, so you can say "kakusu" for hiding someone or something, but for hiding yourself, it's kakureru. Maybe it could become "hide me" in this case?
 
Lol ill ask my professor about it too since I'm kinda confused hahaha

Huh? It says waves because the kanji is for waves. I made a mistake and typed up namida for some weird reason haha silly me

Oh wow you are right. I forgot about kakureru. It sounds a lot better as hide me lol I forgot all about kakureru...
 
Okay... I don't know when I'll have time to meet sensei (she's Japanese and yet doesn't know how to use a computer!), so I asked a Japanese friend that happened to be online...

friend: 僕がみてもぜんぜんわからないから
friend: そのまま訳してしまったらいいとおもうよ
me: A) before long, things will be delayed
on the other side of the dead end.
i knew only of that heaviness
that also had no voice.

B) All I knew was the heaviness
of the delayed things on the other side of the street
that soon became a dead end,
without even having a voice

AとBはどっちがいいの?
friend: どっちがいいんだろう
friend: 英語の歌詞についてはそこまで考えたこと無いから
friend: むずかしいね

Okay... it's not too helpful :uh..: ask your teacher and let me know, meanwhile I'll try looking for mine... But at least we know it's not really our fault for not making sense! :XD:
 
I'm sorry if I'm going to make this more difficult but niney has provided another translation here :
www.jpopasia.com/group/fictionjunction/lyrics/elemental/gaika::208535.html

I kinda wanted to ask because well, niney's and nimsaj's are kinda different. Like in "yoru wa himitsu o mamorezu ni kuchibiru o nurasu" - nimsaj's say 'the night wets it lips..' While niney's says 'the night will wet our lips' although I lean more to nimsaj's here. and they're in different in some things too. (At least the way I get it - I'm not fluent in both English and Japanese lol.) :XD:
 
Thanks for that link! I quickly checked that translation, and nimsaj's one is much more accurate.

The part with the wet lips... It's not strictly specified in the verse, maybe Kajiura left it vague on purpose, but I also tend to think that the night wets its own lips - in fact, I was also wondering whose lips they were - I tend to think that it should have been specified if it had been "our" lips, but that's mostly intuition so I wouldn't insist.
 
Thanks for that link! I quickly checked that translation, and nimsaj's one is much more accurate.

The part with the wet lips... It's not strictly specified in the verse, maybe Kajiura left it vague on purpose, but I also tend to think that the night wets its own lips - in fact, I was also wondering whose lips they were - I tend to think that it should have been specified if it had been "our" lips, but that's mostly intuition so I wouldn't insist.

Ah, I think it that way too - it should have been specified if it had been "our" lips, because my opinion about that verse is that the whole thing is centered to yoru/night. But then again, maybe niney said our because the stanza before told about "bokura no nodo wo narashita muzan na gaika" (I'm using my phone here, so I'm too lazy to type the kanji lol) so maybe the point of view is from "bokura" looking at "yoru" so it's "the night will wet our lips"?
 
sorry i've been absent, guys. i've been so busy -__-;;

anyways, i agree with yuki.n and ritardando. bokura is detached from the verse. also, the first line, she writes about the moon and what its doing. so then she writes what happens to the night. there is no boku/watashi/bokura in this. she tends to personify many things like the moon, the sky, the earth, and the night/day etc etc so i see no problem here i think. i hope that makes sense?

also, meeting with my professor in a few minutes. i'll go back on tonight to let you guys know about the 1st verse :)
 
haha because I've been too concentrating to that line (yoru wa himitsu...) and the bokura I forgot to take a look at the line before (konna ni aoku...tsuki ga hikaru kara) And yeah nimsaj I got your point there.

Waiting for your professor's opinion then. :XD: Dammit this discussion makes me more and more regretting my decision for not taking literature as my major :"(
 
LOL okay, so guys. my prof was like

" if it were up to me, A makes more sense since i would re-arrange the verse like this:

やがて途絶えた道の
向こうにものを淀む。
その重さだけ
声もない(ことを/と)知っていた。 "

she also said it's interesting that there is no kanji for もの so the listener can either interpret it as 物 or 者. she also wrote down different ways to say the verse.


things(people) will soon become motionless
on the other side road that has been cut off.
all i used to know of was that voiceless heaviness. (or all i used to know was of that heaviness that has no voice)

she said "heaviness" refers to the heaviness of which is the result from things becoming motionless on the other side [..].

i really like her version of the verse. what do you guys think yuki.n & ritardando?
 
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@nimsaj , yes. suddenly it makes sense now! :goodjob: :sohappy:
@george1234, i think that nimsaj's latest correction can be applied to her translation and gaika is ready... As for the other 2 songs, I really don't have time to check them these days, so either someone else can check them and make the needed corrections (nimsaj? can you?), or they'll have to wait. :uh..:
 
Code:
[kudasai..]

ah...
ah...

sorti mirta forti mia
ah...
asti mia

ah...
ah...

[tadayoimashita..]

ah...
ah...

[utaitsuzukete..]

asti mia

misti ola sorti mia

(ah...)

this is the kajiurago I can hear in gaika. the words in [..] are just the parts after which the kajiurago are heard, to help me place it in the lyrics, so dont mind it. Also does anyone have any idea what Yuriko Kaida says a bit after 5:00 ?
 
george, here is the version from the first page plus the corrected first verse. the one you've uploaded has many mistakes (i have no idea where you got it lol)



things will soon become motionless
on the other side road that has been cut off.
all i used to know of was that voiceless heaviness.

in a transient morning,
our singing voices clearly chimed
with a song of lies,
a cruel song of victory.

since the moon still shines in blue, in a blue such as this,
the night wets its lips without being able to protect its secrets.
many doors are yet everlastingly kept shut;
please hide me within that unreachable darkness.

the boat was too small to carry time. *
it sank its rudder,
and merely drifted in the waves.

when the gasping of spring nurtures yearning,
we continue to sing of joy while staggering.

the cold sound of bells
that flicker separately
light up fireworks
deep within our eyes.

like a picture that was sharpened and is drawn in monochrome,
sharpen my heart
until the day your bone is exposed. **

we, who posses nothing, are singing our awkward victory song,
in order to merely survive for a moment.
within my heart that i still keep everlastingly locked,
nothing but a white noise-like sound echoes scatteringly. ***

the melody of the night
that is oh so much more sweeter than a dream,
is a silent melody
that gets too close until it becomes distant.

since the moon still shines in blue, in a blue such as this,
we sing distortedly while staggering.
 
From Kuga , who has supposedly taken it from you :P

also I implimented the corrections you and yuki.n did to the lyrics

( :uh: now i have to replace all the stanzas ? *is lazy*)
 
From Kuga , who has supposedly taken it from you :P

also I implimented the corrections you and yuki.n did to the lyrics

( :uh: now i have to replace all the stanzas ? *is lazy*)

I did a mark-up using the original translation, and was unclear how later correction were to be applied, and asked for some guidance (e.g. redline/strikeout).

I could update the lyrics based on nimsaj's corrected translation if you don't want to do it.
 
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